The busy person's guide to meditating: Suggestions

The busy person's guide to meditating

It's better to meditate for three minutes daily than plan on 20 minutes and quit because you don't have time.

By Fran Sussman

For the Times Herald-Record

Published: 2:00 AM - 02/07/12

Silence. Stillness. Emptiness. These concepts may seem elusive, even frightening, yet they are the supposed goals of meditation, which has so many touted benefits. What are we, in our distracted, wired and multitasking culture, to do?

Let's clear up some common misunderstandings and make this helpful, healthful practice available to you, today.

What you don't need

A mantra, a secret technique from a guru, a special cushion, an altar, any religious or spiritual belief or sitting position.

What you do need

1. Consistency. Better to sit for three minutes daily than plan on 20 minutes and quit, or practice less frequently because you "don't have time." Use a timer, providing an audible cue, so you don't need to watch the clock.

2. Kindness and compassion for yourself. It's called "practice," not "perfection." The key is to bring yourself back to your intent, without blame or judgment, each time you're distracted. Distraction happens repeatedly, even for experienced meditators. This is the normal process of meditation. Everyone's mind wanders. The heart of practice is to be grateful when you notice, and refocus. Some days it flows more easily, and some days you struggle. That's normal, too.

Get started

This simple meditation practice can be used for a lifetime. Sit comfortably. Notice your breath, where it enters your body, how it travels through your body, and how it exits. When you become distracted by thoughts or feelings, return your focus to your breath without blame or judgment. You can learn to notice what your mind does, without being "seduced" by it.

Benefits

-- Strength of mind is like strength of body. Perseverance and repetition developed in small daily commitments strengthen us for larger challenges. When we follow through with our commitments, self-esteem improves; we experience being trustworthy. Learning to show up for practice establishes an important blueprint for other areas of our lives.
-- If you are doing the same practice every day, the only element that changes is you. Regular practice holds a mirror for you to see yourself more clearly.
-- Everyone needs time to "drop anchor" each day, momentarily withdrawing from life's stresses. Meditation leaves you more energized and focused.
-- Meditation lowers stress hormones, cholesterol, blood pressure, reduces heart disease, improves insulin sensitivity and slows effects of aging.

Fran Sussman has been a holistic practitioner in Orange County since 1993, combining nutritional counseling, kinesiology and homeopathy to address a wide range of issues for clients of all ages. Visit www.fransussman.com or call 496-0385.

Karah Pino, MAcOM is the facilitator of Peace is in Pieces Blog. Please email submissions to: peaceisinpieces@gmail.com How do you create a Piece of Peace?

Meditate to get a date: love yourself first, and others will follow.

Meditate to get a date

A spiritual guru says the secret is to love yourself first, and others will follow.

By YouBeauty.comTue, Feb 07 2012 at 10:49 AM EST

Photo: Jupiter Images

If you want to get a date this Valentine’s Day, cross your legs, close your eyes and say “Om.”

Or, turn on “MediDating: Meditations for Fearless Romance,” a new collection of meditations from Gabrielle Bernstein, best-selling author and spiritual guru to Manhattan’s young and restless.

MediDating is a series of love meditations to help you release all those fears about winding up sad and alone with a growing collection of cats. It’s about making peace with yourself and learning to love your life before you go looking for love.

“The romantic areas of our lives can often be the most anxious and uncomfortable areas,” says Bernstein. “That anxiety is blocking us from finding romance or enjoying the romance we do have. Meditation is a way to center yourself and release that anxiety."

Her meditations start by helping you let go of what she calls "romantic delusions," otherwise known as totally unrealistic expectations. That mental image of your perfect mate (epitomized on "30 Rock" by Liz Lemon's fantasy of astronaut Mike Dexter) sheds a light of imperfection on your partner—all you see are the ways he doesn’t measure up.

Of course, letting go of those expectations won’t happen overnight.

Bernstein encourages people to spend three or four months on the first seven meditations, allowing time to process tough emotions. “Often, when we’re living in a fast-paced environment, we bulldoze over our emotions,” she says. “When we meditate, we have this space to experience our feelings. They can be worked through and calmed down.”

Joanna, 28, feels that she’s a different person today because of meditation. “I used to define myself based on who I was dating,” she says. “I had been looking for happiness outside of myself and didn’t even know who I was. [Through meditation,] I started really loving myself and getting to know myself. I’m no longer looking to meet someone to complete some sort of hole that I was trying to fill."

She’s still single today (there are no magic tricks hidden in these tracks), but she’s happier—and that’s the point. “It’s not about getting a man or a partner,” says Bernstein. “It’s about releasing the blocks to become a magnet that attracts what you desire.”

The final meditations, known as the “manifestation” meditations, boost your mojo by teaching you to be present with others and to live a fulfilling, vibrant life no matter your relationship status. (Not only are you more likely to meet someone when you lead an active life, showing confidence and personal interests will make you a more appealing partner.)

The meditations encourage you to visualize a love-filled life, but protect against “future-tripping,” Bernstein’s term for indulging a vision of the future with only one path—or aisle—to success.

“For love in general, we have so many plans,” says Arielle, 28. “We expect to get married at a certain age, have babies at a certain age, have a certain career. [Meditation] taught me how to let go of those plans, not try to force and control it so much.”

In fact, speed-dating studies show that letting go of those plans—and the anxiety about whether they’ll pan out—is essential for piquing romantic interest. Within a few minutes of meeting, we can sense desperation, and when we do, we’re much less likely to opt for a second date.

In many ways, Bernstein is simply sharing a method that worked for her. “I was really stuck for the first 25 years of my life,” she says, “believing that a romantic partner would be my salvation and my source of happiness. Through my spiritual practice, I was able to fill myself up and let all of those romantic partners off the hook by turning inward to find what I was looking for.”

The beauty of these meditations is that just when you learn to attract a man, you’ll realize you don’t need one.

Also on YouBeauty.com:

Meditation for Beginners

Nadia Goodman originally wrote this story for YouBeauty.com. It is reprinted with permission here.

Karah Pino, MAcOM is the facilitator of Peace is in Pieces Blog. Please email submissions to: peaceisinpieces@gmail.com How do you create a Piece of Peace?

Huff Post: Give Your Memory a Boost With Meditation

Give Your Memory a Boost With Meditation

Susan Morales, M.S.W.

Psychotherapist and student/practitioner of meditation

I don't know anyone over 50 who does not complain about his/her memory. Former poet laureate Billy Collins' poem "Forgetfulness" comes to mind. The first stanza convinces me that my friends and I are not alone:

"The name of the author is the first to go
followed obediently by the title, the plot,
the heartbreaking conclusion, the entire novel
which suddenly becomes one you have never read,
never even heard of."

Recently, I noticed that I wasn't having as much trouble accessing my memory. When I do have a slip and can't immediately recall why I'm leaving one room of my house for another, I find that if I stop for a moment, the reason comes back to me. This is a departure from many previous experiences of having to retrace my steps, ask someone what I was doing, or simply giving up.

I believe the improvement has to do with meditation. There is ample research to support the idea that meditating regularly helps memory by changing the brain itself. Besides the physical changes, I theorize that meditation also helps improve memory in the following ways:

1. We pay better attention. Instead of daydreaming, worrying or strategizing about the future or reflecting or agonizing about the past, in meditation we learn how to be aware and alert in the present moment. This means our focus is on what we are doing. We notice details that give us help when we want to recall something. Have you had the experience of driving somewhere and not being able to remember anything about the drive? Maybe not even the route you took? That's because your attention wasn't on the activity of driving but somewhere else instead.

2. The increased mental capacity allows us to find new ways to store and retrieve information. I used to have a powerful photographic memory. During a test at school, I could recall the page and paragraph where I saw the answer in the textbook. Although I still have some of that ability, I find I'm now able to remember easily through association as well.

3. Simply the discipline of sitting quietly, sometimes being uncomfortable in our bodies or with our thoughts, creates patience. This is very helpful to our memory retrieval. What do you do when you forget something? Do you get impatient, frustrated? If you do, you've added another barrier -- tension -- between you and the information you are after.

Although there has been evidence to support the link between meditation and memory for many years, I don't know anyone who started to meditate for this reason. The payoff probably seems too far off, like training for an ultra marathon run. The subjects in one study meditated 40 minutes a day for an average of eight years. This may seem like a long time however, like with a long, slow run, there's a lot to learn and see on the trail.

I've had many delightful surprises during my meditations -- releases of pain, anxiety and gifts of new insights and ideas. Each meditation is like taking a journey, a vacation to a place I've never been.

I believe any meditation technique can be effective, however here is a simple meditation method for you to try:

Sit comfortably, close your eyes and take a deep breath. Release the breath slowly. Now return your breathing to normal. Notice where in your body the breath originates. Does your upper chest rise? Do you feel an expansion in your diaphragm or lower abs? Without judging the process, simply be aware of where the breath begins and ends. There is no effort. The body naturally breathes itself. As you continue observe this, also notice how the breath moves other parts of your body. Perhaps you'll sense your shoulders rising and your back expanding. You may even feel a slight movement in your hands or feet. Stay open to learning how the breath moves naturally within you.

If your thoughts begin to intrude, simply return your focus to how you are experiencing your breath. Let this lead you into meditation, where peace and serenity spreads throughout your mind and body.

For more by Susan Morales, M.S.W., click here.
For more on meditation, click here.
For more than 20 years, Susan Morales, M.S.W. has explored human behavior through her work as a psychotherapist, and as a student/practitioner of meditation. In addition to using meditation as a device to help clients with issues of anxiety and depression, she offers classes and retreats to women in substance abuse recovery. She developed Be Who You Love Meditation as a method to teach people how to find greater depth of satisfaction in their lives. She blogs on meditation for annarbor.com and Red Room, and was on the editorial board for "The Voice of Social Workers: Poets and Writers," a journal recently published by the Michigan chapter of NASW. Visit her on Red Room, where you can buy her books.

Karah Pino, MAcOM is the facilitator of Peace is in Pieces Blog. Please email submissions to: peaceisinpieces@gmail.com How do you create a Piece of Peace?

Top 10 Good News of the Week!

Charles Dickens was born 200 years ago today. He rose from poverty to become the most popular novelist of the Victorian age, similar to J.K. Rowlings' rags-to-riches fame today. (Harry Potter as David Copperfield.) Read about the events and parties celebrating the author of A Christmas Carol... "Good bless us, every one!" ~ Geri

Top 10 Good News Stories of the Week

AmeriCorps Honored for 579,000 Hours of Joplin Tornado Relief Work
Missouri legislators passed a resolution honoring AmeriCorps members from across the country who played an indispensable role in helping the city of Joplin recover from the devastating tornado that flattened more than 7,000 buildings last May. The first AmeriCorps members arrived within hours after the tornado struck, and hundreds have served continually since then.
Experts Said it Wouldn't Work, Rescue Dog & Dying Boy Proved Them Wrong

As nearly anyone who has adopted a pet from a shelter can attest, there's something special about a rescued animal; it's as if they can sense they've been given a second chance at life. But Juno, a Belgian Malinois who was adopted just days before she was to be euthanized, has now taken on the role of rescuer to a 4-year-old dying boy, whom experts believed was not suited for any service dog.
Generous Americans Give More to Charity in 2011

Americans gave a total of nearly $347 billion to charity in 2011, a 7.5 percent increase over 2010, according to a report released Tuesday by Atlas of Giving. Total giving to U.S. nonprofits increased by $24.2 billion over the 2010 total. (MSNBC)
Donors Step Up for 101-year-old Evicted Woman in Detroit

A fund has been created and a guardian angel stepped forward for a 101-year-old Detroit woman displaced from her home by eviction. A longtime member of her church took in the wheelchair-bound woman and a contractor volunteered to build the wheelchair ramp needed at her new residence
Ellen DeGeneres Helps Heroic Teacher Who Pledged to Work for Free
Last month, teachers in Chester, Pennsylvania were hailed as heroes when they pledged to work for free after their school ran out of money. The Ellen DeGeneres Show presented a teacher representative with some surprises, including a $100,000 check for their school.
Whale Film "Big Miracle" is a Charmer - And, True

In this delightful family film based on a true story, a family of gray whales, stranded beneath the ice near the northern-most Alaskan town of Barrow, brings together old foes in an inspiring rescue operation that catches the attention of the whole world. The tragedy unfolding suddenly has every government agency, scientist, press reporter and Greenpeace activist faced with the question of what can be done, if anything. All the town's children miss school to join the rescue. (Video)
Woman's Accidental Call During Emergency Helps Save Her Life
Loretta Smith, 70, of Cuyahoga Falls, Ohio, was having a stroke last week when she tried to call her son. Instead she got Kenny Crater, 28, a student who lives in Broomfield, Colo., near Denver. It was a mis-dialed call that ended up saving her life. (ABC)
Is This the Most Beautiful Street in the World?
There are many memorable streets in cities across the globe, some marked by monuments and famous buildings. But the most scenic may be those with natural beauty. Rua Gonçalo de Carvalho in Brazil turn heads with its towering tipuana trees lining the road like a living colonnade. (TreeHugger)
Australia's Best Boss: Bus Company CEO Gives Staff $15 Million
A Melbourne boss has stunned his staff by giving them a staggering $15 million gift -- the ultimate pay-off for their hard work and loyalty. Workers at the bus company Grenda couldn't believe their good fortune when surprise bonuses averaging $8500 were paid into their accounts - with some staff receiving as much as $30,000. (News.au)
Fungi Discovered In The Amazon Can Devour Plastic in Landfills
The Amazon is home to more species than almost anywhere else on earth. One fungus, carried home recently by a group from Yale University, appears to be quite happy eating plastic in airless landfills. (FastCoexist)

Video of the Week: 74-year-old Jane Fonda on Life's Third Act

Jane Fonda thinks perhaps the most important revolution today is the longevity revolution. But society is still living with the old paradigm of aging -- seeing it as a "decline into decrepitude." Fonda thinks it should be seen as a unique developmental stage of life marked by wisdom and happiness. (Watch the Prime Time Ted-x Talk)

Tai Chi and Parkinsons, Hardwired for the mystical?

Hardwired for the Mystical?
Huffington Post (blog)
Newberg is a pioneer in the field of "neurotheology," the study of how the brain approaches faith. For example, the frontal lobe of the brain governs reward, attention and motivation. In past studies, those who meditate or pray regularly seem to have ...

Tai Chi Benefits Patients With Parkinson's
New York Times (blog)
Tai chi, an ancient martial art characterized by slow, flowing movement and meditation, helps improve balance and movement control for people with Parkinson's disease. In Parkinson's disease, nerve cells in the brain that produce the chemical dopamine ...

Feb 15th: PURE DEMOCRACY: Peacemaking using an Indigenous Process with Patricia Anne Davis

Presentation of Pure Democracy taking place Feb 15th at 5pm at the Washington State Convention Center beneath the escalators.

Please help us spread the word!

Please RSVP on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/events/188898871209863/

New post on Native American Concepts

PURE DEMOCRACY: Peacemaking using an Indigenous Process

by Patricia Anne Davis, MA Choctaw-Navajo/Chahta-Dineh

Peacemaking Process Based on Indigenous Wisdom 1. Problem Identification: naming the out-of-balance condition. Fraud and corruption in leaders and in the government and corporations Core Issue: the root cause that maintains the out-of-balance condition. Addiction to greed – never enough and never satisfied 2. Obstacles: emptying is correcting the obstacles to internal change that [...]

My Brain says: Left and Right

“I am the left brain. I am a scientist. A mathematician. I love the familiar. I categorize. I am accurate. Linear. Analytical. Strategic. I am practical. Always in control. A master of words and language. Realistic. I calculate equations and play with numbers. I am order. I am logic. I know exactly who I am.”

“I am the right brain. I am creativity. A free spirit. I am passion. Yearning. Sensuality. I am the sound of roaring laughter. I am taste. The feeling of sand beneath bare feat. I am movement. Vivid colors. I am the urge to paint on an empty canvas. I am boundless imagination. Art. Poetry. I sense. I feel. I am everything I wanted to be.”

Karah Pino, MAcOM is the facilitator of Peace is in Pieces Blog. Please email submissions to: peaceisinpieces@gmail.com How do you create a Piece of Peace?

Research on meditation and Tai Chi

Study: Tai chi improves balance in Parkinson's patients
CNN (blog)
Researchers and aficionados of the ancient Chinese art of tai chi are already aware of how this moving meditation can help reduce stress and improve balance. Now a new study finds that the gentle flowing motions of this so-called "soft martial art" can ...
See all stories on this topic »

Hardwired For The Mystical?
Science 2.0
In past studies, those who meditate or pray regularly seem to have more active frontal lobes on average than those who do not. Meditation has even been shown to grow the frontal lobe. Newberg's own research has measured changes in cerebral blood flow ...
See all stories on this topic »

Stressed Out? Guided Imagery and Meditation Can Help, Researchers Say

Posted Jan 26, 2012 7:31 AM CST
By Debra Cassens Weiss

Updated: Stress can be good when it spurs peak performance to meet a challenge. But those who are plagued by so much stress that they experience agitation and insomnia need to dial it down.

Researchers and psychologists are offering solutions for the overstressed, the Wall Street Journal reports. They recommend training in meditation and mindfulness, as well as guided imagery.

Stress on the job is also linked to depression, according to a recent study cited by ABC News. A study of middle-aged government workers in Great Britain suggests that those who work long hours are twice as likely to experience a major episode of depression. Those who worked more than 11 hours a day were at greatest risk.

Home builder Carl Weissensee began using guided imagery and deep breathing to deal with stress after experiencing insomnia and a heart attack, the Wall Street Journal says. Weissensee acknowledges his worries, then practices skipping over them and telling himself the problems will work themselves out.

Now, he tells the newspaper, he no longer thinks "I'm doomed" when faced with worries. "My goal is to worry just enough to do my job well," he says.

Updated at 8:50 a.m. to include ABC News coverage.

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